Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Week 5 Weigh-In

Still plugging along and going strong 5 weeks in! Truly, I am thanking God for the motivation and self-discipline I have had so far. Not to mention that I continue to find myself going deeper and deeper into studying how to heal and nourish my body in all new ways which I have found exciting.

One thing I really am trying to retrain my brain on is to not view this as a diet. I am not simply trying to stay under a calorie goal for the day but actually chose healthier foods in the process. One area that I am majorly struggling with when it comes to this diet mentality is on weigh day. I found myself last week doing the thing I used to do long ago in Weight Watchers which is to use my weigh day as a cheat day. To let myself have whatever I want because it would be a whole other week before I had to step on that scale. This meant last Wednesday night for dinner we made a trip to Texas Roadhouse, simply because it was weigh day. No big deal, right? Not really except that it usually bleeds into the next day as well. Hubby brought up this new burger at Carl's Junior I had been wanting to try so that ended up being lunch on Thursday. It's like once I get started on that cheat mentality it's hard to reign it back in. Now that is two days of less than desirable eating I have to combat the rest of the week.

To be clear, I am not opposed to eating out or even fast food. I would like to one day cut out the unhealthy restaurants from my families dining experiences but at this point I am choosing to let everything in moderation be permissible. My issue really is more a mental one, which is a huge part of my weight battle, and I am wanting to fight that part of my brain that rationalizes bad choices or tries to turn bad choices into reasons to quit. When I catch myself getting wrapped up in some of those mental struggles that have plagued me all during my weight battle, I am trying to recognize them and call them out so to speak. Then I can work to replace those not so healthy thoughts and behaviors with ones that are more positive and beneficial. If I can stop trying to cheat myself and simply live right and eat healthy, I will benefit that much more. And then when different life events pop up that naturally present a more indulgent eating opportunity, I can participate and not feel guilty or like I am completely knocked off track.

Whew, that was a lot of words but I found myself feeling a little bothered by the direction of the blog so far. I definitely want to continue sharing what I am eating and what my progress is but weight loss is so much more than that for most people, myself included. I don't want to exclude the rest of that because I think it's actually more important than the food and the scale. Those mental, spiritual, emotional struggles are often the real issue behind the weight and if we can't address them, talk about them, share them - we will go right back to the unhealthy things that caused weight to be a problem to begin with. So I am going to dig a little deeper and be more transparent in those personal aspects of my journey that hopefully some of you will be able to relate to. Stick with me, this is just the beginning so things are going to grow and change along the way!

Okay - let's get down to it. My weigh in for this week has me at 298.2 pounds. That's a 1.8 pound loss for the week! I'll take it (especially with those not-so-waste-friendly food choices at the beginning of the week). That has me at a total loss of 20.6 pounds in 5 weeks. I am feeling strong and determined and would love to continue at this pace. My goal of 50 pounds lost by my next birthday (September 6, 2015) is in reach and I am going to fight to accomplish it. Here's what the journey has looked like so far as I've been tracking it on

(The orange star is showing my next small goal of weighing 294 by May 6)

What are some of your mental struggles when it comes to weight loss? How do you keep them in check and work to replace the negative actions and thoughts with positive ones?

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