Ready to make a change

Weight. It's a battle. One I personally have been struggling with for as long as I can remember. Not to say that I haven't experienced some successes along the way, but never long term. I have never been able to shake the grip that food has on me and truly embrace a life long change. But that is my desire and so here I am. Sick and tired of being so sick and tired. Ready to pull my bootstraps up and climb this hill one more time.

I started this blog as an accountability for myself. A place to document my journey. To share my successes and struggles. Right now it's just for me. But my hope is that one day it will encourage someone else who is in this place too. What's it going to look like? As far as content goes, I'm not totally sure yet. I can tell you that it will be 100% me - real, honest, transparent. I'm not going to lie, it scares me a little. To be so vulnerable about something that has caused me so much shame for so long. But I know that to conquer this I have to shake the fear and that when you expose the dark parts of yourself to light they are no longer able to hide in those shadows.

Let's just get right to it and be as real as possible. I'm going to share with you not only what I look like right now (anybody else typically try to avoid pictures of themselves???), but also what I weigh going into this. Yup, putting it all out there. {Gulp} Here goes.....

318.6 

Wow. Never in my life could I have imagined seeing this weight on the scale. Not even when I was pregnant with my twins did I reach this weight. Things have gotten out of hand, to say the least. No more. I am not a victim here, I have done this to myself and the one good thing in being able to admit that is knowing that I am in control and capable of changing this pattern. It doesn't have to be this way.

This is the first step. Putting it out there. Now to move forward one foot in front of the other.